Walking Thoughts

Gonna write you a letter. Gonna write you a book. Want to see your reaction. Want to see how it looks.

I walk. 1-2-3. 1-2-3. is my stride. My breath tastes like ice and the air around me lightly bounces over my glasses to gently nip at my eyes. My hair is a rag-dollish length now and though my glasses act as border control, the combination of the air and the few strands that get through are the start of a very shallow well. I can't feel my nose much any more and my glove-wearing hands open and close in my coat pockets to keep the circulation going. It is a long walk and a time to think.

I walk. There are very few people in the streets. How can a city so full be so empty? The city is not a safe place: I must keep looking around as I walk so I will never be caught off guard. I think on. Have you ever gone to the movies by yourself and there was also no one in the theater? It is a completely different experience. There was a little girl with her dad in the row ahead of me and the movie was so funny to her. She was so innocent - didn't she see the ideas that were humorously being pushed into her mind through the animated characters? Isn't it beautiful that she doesn't? I wonder if that part was scary for her. My mom said that I cried when I watched Snow White in the theaters because of that bitch the witch.

I walk. I look up. Where the road melds into a brick pathway lays an albino van like a panther with open eyes that probe the darkness in front of it. I can see into its brain where 2 people control its mind. I continue upward in my observance. The pathway goes past Tech Tower and to my destination. Without warning, the main operator grinds a nerve and the cat hisses.

I studder-step. Is he hissing at me? I look around. No one. I look at the operator. He follows me with his eyes but says nothing. I pass in front of the cat's eyes nonchalantly but jostled inside with the suddenness of it all. Why did they do that? Are they laughing at me? I am out of their sight and I pass a woman who is wearing clothes similar to the operator. I no longer think about the cat. Back to walking through nothingness. I feel alone and want to be alone. Insignificant - is connecting with people pre-programmed? I guess it doesn't matter too much: I sure do enjoy connecting with people.

I walk. The streetlight changes and a car stops. I am at a distance where the light will probably change again right as I would be crossing there. Will I go in front of the car or out of courtesy act like I'm going another way and then go behind it? I not-so-secretly want to enjoy everything I do. I used to want to be the best at everything. Secretly, I still desire this, but it is impossible. However, if there is a slight chance I will try. Damn laziness.

I stop. I am at my destination...or am I? The thinking continues.